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Help! I've been spanked by Mark McGwire - banner created and copyright 1998 by Ivy le Jolie

There has been a whole lot of stuff in the news about Mark McGwire and baseball records. Apparently there's some kind of competition going on between Mark McGwire and Sammy Sosa to be the first to break Roger Maris' record for hitting the most home runs during a season. There is also some kind of competition between the networks and stations that cover these baseball games - all trying to be the one who owns the rights to the famous game. On the side, there's also some competition going on between fans to be the one to catch the record-breaking ball.

Has anyone thought about how the baseball feels? Think about it - all this hype, attention, talk, spin, controversy, hopes and dreams - centering on a little baseball, probably just one of many sitting in a bucket somewhere. So there's this whole bucket of baseballs who feel the tension in the air, wondering if they will be the one picked. Where's the media to cover this competition? Are the baseballs polished and ready? Are they scared of that bat whacking them in the fanny? Do they even really know what's at stake here?

By the way, what is at stake here? If it's anything like real life, the bottom line is always money. Endorsements, hall of fame entries, juicy contracts - what is the prize here? I've seen those news reports where they ask folks what they'd do with the ball if they caught it. Some say they'd give it to the player - others are more than willing to sell it for six figures or more. So it does seem to come down to the dough. Yet with so much hype surrounding this, you would think that something really cool is going on here... and you would be right.

The all-American sport that is mentioned in the same reverent whisper as Mom and apple pie has captured the attention of the public in a way that transcends which tv station is playing which game. The fans are driving from miles around to attend the games in person. The children talk about this subject everyday. The media can't get enough of it. However, the point is that baseball has arrived just in the nick of time to save us from boredom and stupid news.

Think about it - what news stories in recent months can you think of? Even odds the name Monica Lewinsky pops into your mind. The public humiliation and political emasculation of the President has been big news. Hmm... nuclear testing over in Pakistan and India. Then there's the peace that was supposed to have arrived in Ireland, shattered by more violence. Embassies being blown up in Africa. Sun storms hitting the Earth. Teetering on the edge of global financial collapse. You get the idea - it hasn't been pretty.

Then along comes this fantastic baseball season. Baseball - the sport of young children, the American pasttime, the epitome of teamwork. Not only is this a positive activity (as opposed to bombings and such), it has taken over during the first five minutes of the news broadcasts. Our minds are spared that many more minutes of depressing, bleak, unhappy reports. Hurray for baseball!

If you would like to keep up to date on how the players are doing, check out CNN's Coverage. It's not only colorful, but it also has QuickTime movies of the home runs.

This has been an editorial essay by Ivy.
Essay and banner copyright 1998 by Ivy le Jolie.




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